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Sat, Sep. 24th, 2005, 12:54 pm
karlaboo: Hey Little Darlin's

I haven't posted here in a while, it looks like no one has in quite a bit. Where are you girls? :)

I am slightly freaking out. My husband is working at the same club that he's been with for around a year and a half. He's the Audio Engineer there. He keeps getting offers from bands to "go on the road" with them. It's a little disturbing every time. But.... last night when he got home he said the band he had was begging him, the band, the crew, everyone involved with them. They tour nationally, so he had to say no. He told them that we have children, one of which is only 14 months old. He grimaced when he told me they offered him a thousand dollars a week, post taxes. He's making just over half that right now. Money's tight, but we are "suffering for our art" so to speak. I know he wants to be able to do more for our family, and I know that he would love to have a tour to put on his resume. I'm torn between feeling like we are holding him back, and feeling relief that he feels family ties as strongly as I do.


In the meantime, I feel very guilty because he knows how I feel about his job. I wonder, and almost certainly know, that my feelings were a large factor in his decision. I ABHOR his schedule. When the club is heavily booked, and it usually is, the children don't get to see him very much. I have the main parenting role, and if I get sick he can't stay home to help out. He is the only person who does his job where he works.

Wow. This has turned awfully *rant*y. Sorry.

I mainly posted here because I wanted to express my worries, and maybe get some feedback as to whether I am being completely irrational. *sigh*

Thanks, Ladies.


Sat, Sep. 24th, 2005 06:17 pm (UTC)

How long would the tour be? This is a hard question that my husband and i have discussed, since i'm in a band that's about to get an offer from a label.

It basically comes down to whether the benefits of going outweigh the negative aspects - and that's really something that only the two of you can decide.

I would say that if the tour is relatively short and you both can agree on him going, that it would definitely boost his career. On the other hand, if you already feel that he's too busy with work, maybe he doesn't need a career boost?

Anyway, that was singularly unhelpful but i hope you come to a decision that works for you.

Sun, Sep. 25th, 2005 03:08 am (UTC)

I've been thinking about all of those things today. *sigh* I guess it really comes down to what are we willing to give up (time) in order to get ahead (financially, and professionally). We talked a little more about it today, and I get the distinct impression that he was flattered, but really wants to wait until le bebe is a little older.

Thank you for making me feel a little less irrational. :)

Sun, Sep. 25th, 2005 12:09 am (UTC)
noisrevni: I can empathize...

Ever since Justin joined the Marine Corp I get to see him very little at best. I know how strenuous absences can be on a relationship without the complication of children. But overall I agree with XdarkstarX that you have to weigh the options. Do what feels right. I hope everything goes smoothly for you.

Sun, Sep. 25th, 2005 03:10 am (UTC)
karlaboo: Re: I can empathize...

Thank you very much. I am certain it will come up again. He has a very good reputation in his industry, which is great. But, I am dreading that day.....